Holiday Cow

When my son Ben was working at Big Lots in Griffin, he came home one night with a huge grin, and a present for me. Seems a box of candles had come into the store, and he couldn't resist. What strange mind birthed the idea of a black and white cow, wearing what appears to be an orange cornucopia hat with a Pilgrim's buckle, with a jack o'lantern saddle sprouting a wick just where the rider (riding a cow?) would sit? Around her neck instead of a bell hangs a piece of candy corn, and her bright green eyes peer intently through googles looped around her ears. Her ears, her udder and her nose, which is reminiscent of a pig snout, are a bright pink. I sent Ben back for the rest of the cows, and I think he brought home ten. I gave away all but two, which I treasure. Who wouldn't?

The Rug Story

I have dogs. I own dogs, and I have fostered dogs. On September 14, I ordered a rug and a rug pad from a catalog. On the 19th I received an e-mail saving the two items had been shipped, giving me a FedEx tracking number. That was a Monday. Tuesday Tom and I rolled up the old dog-stained rug, exposing the bare brick floor, and carted it off to the recycling center. On Wednesday at 9:09 AM, a FedEx Express truck brought me a box containing the rug pad. I had a hair appointment, so my son was home when at 1:49 PM, a second FedEx Express truck dropped off a large box containing two white wicker chairs. No invoice was attached. And then I began a series of phone calls. I was assured by the catalog company that according to their records, FedEx would be delivering the rug later that day; or if not, the next. And they would mail me a shipping label to return the chairs. A call the next day brought much the same reponse. He was sure the chairs had been sent in addition to the rug, not instead of. But he would put a tracer on the delivery. I should give them until the middle of the next week. Meanwhile the return label came, and I called FedEx for a pick-up. I was asked if the label said "Express" or "Ground." I replied, "Ground," and answered questions about the size and weight of the package. (Big. Contains two wicker armchairs. About 50 pounds.) The next day, only a couple of hours after the time I'd been given, the very same woman who'd delivered the chairs, in an Express truck, arrived and said she couldn't take them. It was a ground shipment, and I should call and re-schedule. It was two days before the ground truck came. Still no rug. I called again, to be told that they would put a tracer on it, and did I think any of my neighbors might have accepted the shipment? But in the meantime, for my trouble, she'd give me a 10 per cent discount on the rug. On October 3rd, two e-mails came, one saying that the chairs had arrived, and they were crediting my credit card for them. The other e-mail said the rug would be shipped on October 16th, but that I would not be charged until it was shipped. My credit card statement also arrived, and I HAD been charged, on September 14th, when I placed the order, for both the rug and the pad. I called again. I was told that my credit card had been credited for the amount of the chairs, which they had received. I said I had never been charged for them. She assured me that all would be well, she would straighten all that out, and that the rug would be shipped the 16th, and then asked if she could put me on hold while she checked on something. (Muzak: "Love, lift us us up where we belong...") Then she came back to say that the rug I had ordered had been permanently discontinued! So, today I go rug-shopping in town. And I will wait to see what the next credit card statement has to say. I have a feeling this is not the end of the rug story!